wet hot almost nakey summer drop

Almost Nakey Hoodie - Puff Print- Black
Almost Nakey Hoodie - Puff Print- Black

Almost Nakey Hoodie - Puff Print- Black

Regular price $62.00
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IT IS BIG HOT ALMOST NAKEY SUMMER. Trust, you will want to own this before it goes so massively viral that you have to search for it on Ebay. Yes, EBAY. 

Cobalt grey outline "Almost" on the front and "Nakey" with GURL SERVING IT UP illustration is printed on the ultimate softest hoodie you could ever wear. After years and years, I can truly tell you, this is our highest quality merch drop ever. AND DARE I SAY, my personal all time favorite. 

Sizing - You will want to size up. I typically wear a small, but I like to swim in my XL. 

Wash this responsibly. No weird red socks in the mix with this prize piece, please. 

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Go Fast Eat Ass Hoodie - Puff Print - Dusty Pink
Go Fast Eat Ass Hoodie - Puff Print - Dusty Pink

Go Fast Eat Ass Hoodie - Puff Print - Dusty Pink

Regular price $62.00
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IT IS BIG HOT ALMOST NAKEY SUMMER. Trust, you will want to own this before it goes so massively viral that you have to search for it on Ebay. Yes, EBAY. 

Black outline Almost Nakey scripture "go fast, eat ass" is printed on the ultimate softest hoodie you could ever wear. After years and years, I can truly tell you, this is our highest quality merch drop ever. AND DARE I SAY, my personal all time favorite. 

Sizing - You will want to size up. I typically wear a small, but I like to swim in my XL. 

Wash this responsibly. No weird red socks in the mix with this prize piece, please. 

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Almost Nakey Hoodie - Puff Print- Bone
Almost Nakey Hoodie - Puff Print- Bone

Almost Nakey Hoodie - Puff Print- Bone

Regular price $62.00
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IT IS BIG HOT ALMOST NAKEY SUMMER. Trust, you will want to own this before it goes so massively viral that you have to search for it on Ebay. Yes, EBAY. 

Natural nude PUFF printed "Almost" on the front and "Nakey" with GURL SERVING IT UP illustration is printed on the ultimate softest hoodie you could ever wear. After years and years, I can truly tell you, this is our highest quality merch drop ever. AND DARE I SAY, my personal all time favorite. 

Sizing - You will want to size up. I typically wear a small, but I like to swim in my XL. 

Wash this responsibly. No weird red socks in the mix with this prize piece, please. 

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Almost Nakey Crewneck - Puff Print - Sandstone
Almost Nakey Crewneck - Puff Print - Sandstone

Almost Nakey Crewneck - Puff Print - Sandstone

Regular price $60.00
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IT IS BIG HOT ALMOST NAKEY SUMMER. Trust, you will want to own this before it goes so massively viral that you have to search for it on Ebay. Yes, EBAY. 

Natural nude PUFF printed "Almost" on the front and "Nakey" with GURL SERVING IT UP illustration is printed on the ultimate softest crewneck you could ever wear. After years and years, I can truly tell you, this is our highest quality merch drop ever. AND DARE I SAY, my personal all time favorite. 

Sizing - You will want to size up. I typically wear a small, but I like to swim in my XL. 

Wash this responsibly. No weird red socks in the mix with this prize piece, please. 

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Get Almost Nakey - Tee
Get Almost Nakey - Tee

Get Almost Nakey - Tee

Regular price $34.00
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IT IS WET HOT ALMOST NAKEY SUMMER. Trust, you will want to own this before it goes so massively viral that you have to search for it on Ebay. Yes, EBAY. 

"Almost Nakey" printed in cobalt outline on front & "If you are going to be Almost Nakey, I've got you covered" on back with our insane nakey babe illustration. After years and years, I can truly tell you, this is our highest quality merch drop ever. AND DARE I SAY, my personal all time favorite. 

Sizing - I typically wear a small, but size up for ultimate cozy level.

No weird washing with red socks in the mix with this prize piece, please. 

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Go Fast Shorts

Go Fast Shorts

Regular price $38.00
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IT IS WET HOT ALMOST NAKEY SUMMER. Trust, you will want to own this before it goes so massively viral that you have to search for it on Ebay. Yes, EBAY. 

After years and years, I can truly tell you, this is our highest quality merch drop ever. AND DARE I SAY, my personal all time favorite. 

Sizing - I typically wear a small, but size up for ultimate cozy level.

No weird red socks in the mix with this prize piece when washing. 

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Swim

SHOP THE COLLECTION

The Almost Nakey Tank
The Almost Nakey Tank
The Almost Nakey Tank

The Almost Nakey Tank

Regular price $34.00
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Everyone's best tank ever.

  • Ready to wear
  • Ultra-Soft
  • 100% Cotton 
  • Machine Wash
  • Made in LA
  • Printed at The Branding Iron in La Jolla, California


Women's Sizing Small  Medium Large
Chest (inches) 26-28
28-30
30-32
Waist (inches) 24-26 26-28 28-30
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Almost Nakey Yacht Club Captains Cap
Almost Nakey Yacht Club Captains Cap
Almost Nakey Yacht Club Captains Cap
Almost Nakey Yacht Club Captains Cap
Almost Nakey Yacht Club Captains Cap

Almost Nakey Yacht Club Captains Cap

Regular price $35.00
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May Poseidon bless you with the honor of an Almost Nakey Yacht Club captains hat. 

With this hat, you will have exclusive access to the Almost Nakey Yacht itself. 

 

Black captains hat & gold stitching. YOU KNOW THE DRILL. 

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The Fastest Hat Ever Made
The Fastest Hat Ever Made
The Fastest Hat Ever Made
The Fastest Hat Ever Made

The Fastest Hat Ever Made

Regular price $35.00
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Almost Nakey is proud to present the Nakey camo cap. 

With speeds this fast, you become invisible. That is why this hat turned camo. 

Please wear with caution. You will begin to go incredibly quick. 

GO FAST EAT ASS.  

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Almost Nakey - High Octane Tank
Almost Nakey - High Octane Tank
Almost Nakey - High Octane Tank

Almost Nakey - High Octane Tank

Regular price $34.00
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Everyone's best tank ever.

  • Ready to wear
  • Ultra-Soft
  • 100% Cotton 
  • Machine Wash
  • Made in LA
  • Printed at The Branding Iron in La Jolla, California


Women's Sizing Small  Medium Large
Chest (inches) 26-28
28-30
30-32
Waist (inches) 24-26 26-28 28-30
Cart